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Tuesday, December 19, 2017

Archer Farms Blueberry Mini Muffins

When I was a very young lad growing up in Hershey, PA, my parents threw a grand soiree for their friends featuring home-baked goods to be shared by all the attendees. Only one other youngster was in attendance—my best friend at the time, whom we'll call Phillip for the sake of this blog post.

He and I were staying out of the way of the adults and were looking to get into a bit of mischief. We began sampling the desserts and pastries at opportune moments here and there when our parents weren't looking. There were pies, cakes, tarts, and a random assortment of cookies. At the end of the table, I spied a basket of blueberry muffins. I don't know what it was about those things, but I fell in love at first bite. I handed one to Phillip. His eyes lit up as he bit into the fluffy muffin. We were both completely enchanted by these treats. I was young enough that these might have been the first blueberry muffins I'd ever had. They were soft, sweet, and nearly perfect in every way.

Phillip and I consumed the entire basket within minutes, giggling as we devoured each one. We left only crumbs and blueberry stains across the bottom of the empty serving container. Suddenly, it dawned on me that our parents and their guests wouldn't be particularly pleased that there were no more blueberry muffins to be served at their party. Surely enough, as we hid out in my bedroom, we heard my mother scream my full name, middle included, and we knew we were in for it. I got a spanking and a stern lecture and Phillip was immediately escorted home. It was one of my earliest memories of corporal punishment—and certainly not my last—but at least in this case, I actually deserved it...all thanks to those delicious blueberry muffins.

These Archer Farms muffins were good enough that history almost repeated itself—except instead of getting in trouble with my parents, it was my wife doling out the corrections this time around. I had already eaten a few of the muffins for breakfast and I was exceptionally hungry after a long hike, and I wound up consuming the whole rest of the container. My wife did get a couple of the muffins in this case, before I managed to polish off the last few—and she liked them enough that she was hoping to go back for more.

It might just be because I was particularly hungry, or that I just always crave blueberry muffins ever since that incident when I was young, but I simply can't give these a low score. They went down pretty easily. Probably not the healthiest muffins I've ever consumed, but hey, it's the holidays. I'll take these blueberry muffins over Christmas cookies any day.

I give these muffins 8 out of 10 stars.

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